trying

I’ve been thinking about how we are all performers in a way. At least for me, I keep trying because I don’t want to be seen as a failure. When I don’t meet my personal goals, I feel like a complete failure. When I try my best and don’t receive appreciation or recognition, I feel…

Friday reflections

Some thoughts I have to get out into the universe before it festers in my mind. This is extremely scattered, but whatevs. The quality of relationships is far more important than the quantity. I’ve been thinking about some of the people I’ve cut out of my life. In my younger days, perhaps it was unfair…

maybe someday one day

Odysseus, you never knew what you wantedbut I want youdays turned into yearsagain comes the autumn moonOdysseus, when will you remember me again?perhaps I’ll become a sirenwould that catch your attention?my song will be the echo of your nameevery man falls under my spellbut I only seduce lovers who are the shadow of youI carve…

fall descends

fall descends upon a lonely worlda crinkled melody plays in the breezeominous shadows creep through the treesI dream of simpler timesin 8th grade I wrote a storyabout a girl named Corona who could time travelshe didn’t expect to leap into a fallwhen she’d be called a virus, a villainessshe didn’t know down a rabbit holeshe’d…

Recent Reflections

Thoughts on a current lesson. My M.O. since birth has been to please people. To make others feel good about themselves by building them up. Even when they may not deserve it. It’s not all pure motives on my part. I think it’s because I’m afraid if I don’t make them feel good or if…

magical madness

I scribble my brain on paper crumpled ugly mess that I struggle to form into something I might understand maybe one day it will become beautiful there’s magic in this madness but it takes a lot of belief to hold onto the magic when the madness drives you to tears and threatens to destroy your…

Napowrimo 2020 Day 30

Prompt: Something that returns our bad habits are like the sea we send them out determined to be free but the tide either circles back or becomes reincarnated as rain seeping into our skin the drugs cycle us back to those lies when we believed we were free once more we’re trapped in the rush…

Napowrimo 2020 Day 29

Prompt: pet she feigns indifference tail flickering head tilted high shrugs from human touch when they want her attention unless she’s in the mood for a massage she’ll make her needs known weaving between her human’s legs golden eyes gleaming with love her independent aura amuses me such sassy cattitude a true introvert she couldn’t…

Napowrimo 2020 Day 28

Prompt: room/space from your past a windowless white room that’s where the madness starts you lay bound to yourself lonely and petrified the voice over the speakers belongs to the master she sounds exactly like you her mocking whispers are words you’d never say to your friends the master says you have no friends and…

Napowrimo 2020 Day 27

Write a poetic review of something not normally reviewed. tick-tock his mocking voice a relentless reminder in your ear you can only grow older under his controlling spell call him father? I think not more like selfish bastard king of crooks a good father would not take away your beauty your ability to mother a…

Napowrimo 2020 Day 26

Fill out an Almanac Questionnaire, and use the answers as the basis for this poem. the fox grins beguiling lover under this half moon can’t see the dark side the shadows never cease to intrigue me this is a conspiracy i tell myself his kingdom runs on exported hearts like mine soul healers attracted to…

Napowrimo 2020 Day 25

Prompt: present tense, meditation in everyday language “in the unknowing” the heat comes another spring to summer these waves seem long but never last life holds no promises of tomorrow of love of dreams come true we struggle in the unknowing the answers come when we fall when we fail when we seek to find…